Breastfeeding Awareness Month

The month is half over and I realize I need to make this post. I had been thinking for a while about what I would write. It’s a love/hate issue for me. I didn’t breastfeed my first two. Well strike that. I tried for a few days with Colton but being born at ten pounds the kid really had no patience to learn. Not to mention I had no education and no help. I had no desire to even try, someone in the hospital said to try. Failed. Formula by day 4 and never looked back. Though he often threw up the formula (I was dumb back then and never thought he might be allergic). Alyssa I never even gave it a second thought. I knew she would be formula fed from the start. She was tiny and stayed tiny but ate well and never had a problem with formula. The girl throws up more from being carsick than she ever threw up on formula.

Which brings this story to my current baby, Aiden. My husband was never really behind me for breastfeeding. He didn’t think I would stick with it. However he was forced to quit his job and we were out of money. It was then I knew I would try like hell to breastfeed this little guy. I grilled my friend Lera day and night about what to do. My concerns were my HUGE boobs and nipples and his tiny mouth. In the end I felt like I was prepared and when the day came and he was born, that first time he latched, I was in love.

BUT

He was a horrible latcher and a lazy nurser. I never got thrush or mastitis amazingly but there were times I came close to quitting. I had one side that hurt every single time he nursed. I was not in love with breastfeeding but I did like the closeness and the fact that even when he was screaming mad, I could nurse him and his body would surrender and be calm. We had to suppliment him from birth though because he never would get full no matter what.

We lasted 8.5 months which is about 7 months longer than I thought we would last. He got teeth and didn’t care anymore and I was ready to stop too but I knew I would miss that closeness. Not to worry though I am still the one person that can calm him. He still loves me the most

I think having done both formula and nursing I prefer the laziness of nursing. I could feed him in bed and go back to sleep. Plus I could just be on the couch with him and feed him and never have to get up. But the reality is I never filled him up on my own. I gave him a great start. But nursing sometimes hurts even when you have a good latch. Large breasted women have it much harder.

I think every mom shouldv try it for 6 weeks but don’t beat yourself up if you can’t do it. I’m glad I tried. I miss it sometimes until I see Aiden take his bottle nipple and bite so hard with his 8 teeth that he almost makes a hole. Yikes.