Making the decision to get married and have a family is a big step to take. People are doing it every day and while some are able to make it work, others may not have the same experience. If you’ve gone down that route, you may be at a crossroads and trying to decide whether to stay with your significant other or not. It isn’t an easy choice to make, however, doing what’s in the best interest of both of you is paramount. If you do decide to separate, to ensure it’s done in the healthiest way possible, see a few tips below.
It has been said frequently that separation, as well as divorce, can get ugly. However, this does not necessarily have to be the case for you. Make up your mind to separate on a high note and work through any issues that you’re having. One of the best ways to achieve this is by working hard to keep positive communication flowing. Even if you feel like you’ve been wronged, learning to be cordial is necessary. It may also help to only engage for as long as politeness requires and end any downward spiraling conversations before things get heated.
Work on Forgiveness
At the route of a messy separation is usually heightened feelings, pain, and unforgiveness. In light of this, work on being more forgiving and also understand that it’s a process. Your feelings are valid, and you’re allowed to be angry, sad, confused, or frustrated.
However, letting such emotions consume you could work to your disadvantage. To forgive and let go of anger, remember that they’re human and that you are too. Also, think of your children and how important it is for them to see a healthy and positive relationship between the two of you.
Create Stability for the Kids
Following on from the previous point, one of the greatest drivers for separating peacefully should be your children. Even if you and your partner are separating, they should still be able to feel a sense of stability, so they aren’t dramatically impacted by your separation. Another way to create stability could be finalizing your divorce so that there’s a sense of closure and everyone can move on. You should look for a divorce lawyer Lake County, IL to help you deal with your unique case.
Take Your Time
Separation can be hard on anyone, especially when you don’t have all of the answers. For this reason, take your time and don’t rush into any final decisions until you’re sure. If you need to, find a therapist who you can discuss your emotions with and that can also help with your healing process. To make sure your separation is as healthy as possible, have an open mind and remember that there is often room for reconciliation. At times, separation can help revive a marriage, so it doesn’t have to be the end if you don’t want it to be.
Separating from someone that you’ve shared and merged your life with isn’t easy. Nevertheless, what’s most important is that you and your family are happy, whether in the same household, or different ones.